Consultant & Coach, France
I am hypersensitive, and over time I put in a lot of protections to avoid being too hurt by others. But these protections also prevented me from enjoying the good sides of human relationships. I just didn’t know how else to ensure I felt safe in my relationships with others. I was afraid to speak out firmly, to say something unpleasant or, worse, to make the person in front of me angry.
When we started the programme, I knew I had to change that. If not, I knew I was going to continue to struggle not only in my personal relationships but also with my children – if I ever have any. I wanted to be able to feel respected and listened to, and be a role model for them. I wanted to be able to show them that it is possible to have difficult conversations, that anger is an emotion like any other and that we don’t have to be afraid of it, and we don’t have to constantly try to please everyone in order to find our place in the world.
I just couldn’t see myself carrying on with the same fears and mental blocks. I also knew that following your program was going to require me to step out of my comfort zone.
Today, I feel stronger. I know that I am not a helpless little creature and that I already have in me what it takes to handle any situation that comes my way. I realised this during one of our sessions, and it changed everything. This completely changed the way I looked at myself.
Thanks to the techniques you showed me, I was able to improve on my inner dialogue and the way I relate with myself. Now I have a concrete and practical approach that I can use to feel safe and which can help me connect with others too. Having these tools reassures me a lot.
During the programme, I also really enjoyed learning more about how we all function as living beings (I would say “human beings”, but you showed that we have a lot in common on the subject with animals, so … ^^). Things like how our brain works with regards to emotions, thoughts, all that…
It is a good feeling to demystify emotions, understand what purpose they serve and how to avoid fuelling unpleasant emotions such as anger or sadness, for hours or even days.
I am now able to take a step back from my own emotions. I know they have a finite lifespan, and I don’t have to let them overwhelm me. I can listen to them, know what to do if necessary, and move on to feel more calm. I am now much less prone to emotional roller coasters.
Your program has helped me become more aware of the progress I have made. It helped me to look at myself from a new perspective.
You helped me to become aware of the positive thoughts I already have about myself, and ways that I can effectively transform negative or critical thoughts into thoughts that are helpful, instead of harmful. These exercises helped me realise that I can be the architect of my thoughts and not their slave.
It is incredible how our attitude towards ourselves changes when we realise that we can choose our thoughts, that we can transform the ones that pull us down and make us feel useless into other thoughts that will help us achieve our goals in life (and learn to love ourselves better on the way).
This process also helped me to recalibrate my emotions. My inner dialogue, today, allows me to be more successful in putting events that may happen into perspective, and I am much less prone to emotional roller coasters.
I know more about my needs and what I mean and want in a “good relationship”. I can now approach my relationship with others differently, try new things. I also know that I have started to build a new inner sense of confidence which gives me great reassurance.
I no longer see my relationship to others the same way. First, because I am less scared. And also because I know that I can rely on my inner dialogue to figure out what to do, without having to systematically try to please everyone.
Agribusiness expert, Australia
I was in a pretty bad state before the program. I was wrapping the final months of a job that hadn’t worked out as I had hoped. I had a sense of failure and was very stressed. Life in London during the lockdown was hard, I felt trapped. It was a hard time for me.
Working with you has helped me see how boundaries can help me manage my tendency to put other people’s needs before mine. I learned how boundaries could help to manage that tendency.
I also realised that I was being passive in some areas of my life – something that goes against my values. Now, I’m more empowered to take the responsibility for how my life works out. That’s been very useful.
I realised that I had limiting beliefs which were holding me back. Turning negatives into positives. I noticed patterns which led me to look at some things in a negative light. I used to believe that changing countries so much was a negative but you helped me see that some negatives can be hugely positive. I saw that my ability to move countries so easily was also very beneficial.
The awareness that I was able to develop is a very useful tool that I expect I will be using over and over again in my life. Today, I’m in a much better place today and very excited about things to come.
Investment banking, Singapore
I had never tried coaching before. My mindset used to be that I could figure it out by myself, that I’m a strong enough person. I thought I could do it all myself. But then, I realised that I wasn’t giving myself the best chances for success.
I started the program when I started a new, very demanding job in banking. I was really worried about how I would manage to fit the program in my schedule. But in retrospect, it was the best timing because that’s the whole point – in life there is never time to focus on yourself.
The program has really helped me transform my ambition and drive. I was worried about removing that ambition and stress without compromising my drive and losing part of my identity. You taught me there are two ways of being driven. That it can come from a place of lack, of fear. Or you can be driven from a sense of wholeness. This was a very important lesson. Because stress can cause burnout. So if you’re trying to prove yourself something constantly you never replenish. Ambition from a place of wholeness is much more sustainable. You expressed it with very easy words and made it easy to understand.
I realised that there are no small traumas. I used to feel I had no trauma so I didn’t need therapy. However I learned that small things that appear like nothing today were not small in childhood when you didn’t have the tools to process them.
I also learned the importance of communicating my needs and, more importantly, how to express them before it’s too late and I feel resentment. The program has helped me reconnect with myself and integrate a focus on my own well being in my day to day life.
I realised that people can help me, that people have the tools to give myself a chance to do things differently. You don’t have to figure everything out yourself. It’s a journey and people like you have seen many examples of people like me, you’ve seen patterns etc. it’s so much easier for people like you to share the tools rather than doing it myself.
Before the coaching, I was trying to bury my emotions. I felt my emotions were an obstacle to my well being and to the well being of my relationships. Emotions felt like they were having a negative impact on my relationships. I really wanted to be able to use my emotions and turn it into a strength instead of letting them be destructive.
I felt at a crossroads in my career and personal life. I struggled to make decisions and have the difficult conversations that would help me make these decisions. I avoided difficult conversations because these would bring emotions out and make me freeze. I felt very stuck in general and I wanted to get out of this trap.
I wanted tools to help me understand and use emotions instead of being overwhelmed.
During the program, I really learned to understand what my needs are and how to communicate them. I realised that this helped me get closer to people and create intimacy whereas before I used to think it was “needy.”
I have a tendency to overthink a lot. You helped me understand that I could turn this into a skill and an ally to help me resolve problems. This was a major mindshift.
I also learned about enforcing boundaries and how these can be negotiated through good communication. I realised I had poor boundaries with a lot of people and I resented them. I am now able to spot poor boundaries by using my emotions and analysing where my needs are not met.
My relationships have improved because I was able to have difficult conversations that I was avoiding. I am also better aware of when I don’t communicate enough. I am more conscious of my patterns and more kind to myself. The program is really about having this tool box and implementing the tools in various situations. These tools also help me help others.
Equine dentist, India
Before the program, I felt I was not able to stand up for myself, that I was not able to voice my own opinions in the correct manner. I often came across as aggressive and that was something I wanted to change. I wanted to become a better person, communicate better and handle emotions and stress better. I wanted to be able to communicate what I feel in a better manner. I also felt I wasn’t able to stand up for myself in certain areas.
The course was both fun but also hard core. It was about getting to the bottom of things that you probably don’t even want to see sometimes. But at the same time it was very useful and very practical. So many things just made sense to me. The program opened up new possibilities for me.
During the program, I learned that I must focus on my communication and stop taking responsibility for other people. I’ve changed how I view conflicts. I now understand that difficult conversations strengthen relationships. I also feel that I’m now able to communicate what I feel in a better manner. Before I would blame and attribute responsibility. Today I am more in control of what is going on. I am able to communicate what I feel and that is the most important.
Your coaching program forced me to ask questions I’d never asked myself – even though I was already the introspective type. The program is very useful and practical – I was straight away able to apply it in day to day situations. Together, we worked on real situations I was struggling with. I have done a lot of other courses but this one was completely different. It felt like getting to the bottom of things. It felt difficult at times but I now know it was necessary to “clean things up.” Charlotte, you have opened up new possibilities for me. I am really grateful for your help.